Life(s)

They say cats have 9 lives.

I know so far I have 2;

My old life and my new life.

New life is good.

It's good in strange ways.

It is very difficult yet equally rewarding.

I've experienced new spiritual highs, and new emotional lows.

I have realized that I had strength and abilities that I never knew existed in me.

I found friends and people to support and help me that I didn't know were there.

It seems like old life was so long ago, and its hard to remember it existed.

But it did.

I see the proof in past family photos.

And when I drive by our old house.

And I am left teary and sad.

I miss old life.

I miss my old friends.

I miss my old work schedule.

I miss having an adult to talk to, and share a bed with, and cook for,

And kill the lizard in my garage.

I guess its easy to yearn for old life when you think of all the good times.

I'm sure new life will be the same, however.

New life seems wonderful when times are good.

But like old life, it seems equally bleak when things are hard.

I guess I'm trying to find a balance between old and new.

Find the parts of me I loved then,

And meld them with the parts of me I'm trying to become now.